It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
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