So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I wish they made helmets for livers.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Randomize
