we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
