very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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