I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
