I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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