Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize