i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
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