actually, I'm a sock model
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
