Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
porn star boner night. come get it.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
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