He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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