I wish life had little blips of pornography
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
