He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
