I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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