You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
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