She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
Randomize
