my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Come on in and take your pants off
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