This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
