i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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