And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
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