i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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