Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
