so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Randomize
