I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize
