Can Purell be used as lube?
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
Randomize
