the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
