were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
