Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
Randomize
