hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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