So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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