Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
