everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
ugly people sure do ruin things
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
