another moral hangover. fuck.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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