I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Please don't give away my fajitas
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
