She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
