Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
