I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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