i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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