It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
you had me at cake vodka
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
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