What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
