Well apparently he's into motor boating.
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Randomize
