Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
