This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
