turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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