I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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