Nicole vs. Life
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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