love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
