Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
