so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
