Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
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